How to get out of chores

There's a meme going around that goes something like, If you screw up the laundry bad enough your wife will never ask you to do it again."

While the Army pretty much beat the fear of public speaking and presentations out of me there were still quite a few chores I really didn't like.  Calling cadence was on of these.  35 years later I can still remember tiny bubbles, Jody, C130's and smashing in the birdie's head but put me up front on a battalion 4 mile run and my brain just locked up. Call of our platoon by itself was nothing but something about calling cadence for 1000 grunts just flipped a switch. 

The company 4 milers typically were run around the airfield or out smoke bomb hill. We would turn out by platoon with a cadence caller for each platoon.  Heading back to the company AO I was tapped to take over.  Imagine watching a group of young, fit soldiers jogging into view.  Everyone is in perfect sync. The sound of their feet hitting the road in time makes a noise that is instantly recognizable.  Then you hear the caller yelling.... Old McDonald had a farm...... and hearing everyone reply E.I.E.I.O. The look on the company commander's face as we jog into the back parking lot to "Moo Moo here, Moo Moo there" was worth the ass chewing I got.  

And that's how you get out of doing a chore you don't like.